Economics: Blah blah blah

Economic comedian Yoram Bauman translates Mankiw's 10 Principles of Economics in this video. The three macro concepts were immediately translated to blah, blah, blah.

Here I want to improve of his efforts and translate some of the many concepts that seem to mystify all who encounter them. Some readers might not agree. Others might have better suggestions. Let me know in the comments. 

Economic Term	Actual Meaning
Capital	Stuff
Capital	Money
Capital	Control
Money	Debts
Money	Barter
Money	Accounting unit
Money	Medium of exchange
Medium of exchange	Accounting unit
Accounting unit	Credits and debits (‘promise unit’)
Production function	Recipe
Time	Just kidding, economists don't care about time
Dynamic	Static
Equilibrium	Magic attractive force
Equilibrium	Current state of the world
Productivity	Unexplained residual
Efficiency	New recipe
Free Markets	Very specific set of government institutions
Rational	Ignorant
Stylised fact	Guess
Scientific	Unfalsifiable
Deadweight loss	Difference between a real pudding, and the magic pudding
Structural reform	Non-specific legal change to give rich people more power in the name of efficiency
Imbalances	Why aren’t we in equilibrium?
Competitiveness	Low wages
Growth	Bigger numbers devoid of meaning
Degenerative scientific research programme	Why don’t people agree with me?
Objective	Laden with hidden value judgments
Strategy	Choice
Choice	Decision
Constraint	State of the world
Opportunity cost	What you could be doing instead
Price	Price
Cost	Some other prices
Rent seeking	Buying political favours
Market failure	Real life
Heterodox	Outside the club. Go home.
Pluralist	Pipe dream
Welfare	Happiness
Utility	Mystical element allowing decisions to be made
Incentives	Monetary incentives
Short run	Arbitrary time period that makes the model work
Long run	The end of time itself
Uncertainty	Perfectly known distribution of possible outcomes
Comparative advantage	Started producing it first
Comparative advantage	Was on/under the land when we conquered
Endowment	How rich your parents are
Technology	Error
Institutions	Error
Beliefs	Error
Expectations	Error
Representative agent	One person
Uniform distribution of agents	One person
Rational	Clairvoyant
Growth	Error
Land	Capital
Property rights	Unspecified institutional setting
Protection	Covertly transferring money to people you know
Restriction	Someone else covertly transferring money to someone they know
Trivial	Vitally important, but I can’t explain it
Aggregation	Fallacy of composition